Question & Answer with Peehands

January 16, 2011

With a new season just around the corner, one thing that everyone is wondering about around the league is the new league commissioner. Will 2011 see a great deal of changes, such as an overhaul on stat categories, stronger policies on performance enhancers, and perhaps even a plan to introduce a salary cap? Here with all the answers is Tim Grothendick, manager of the Peehands since the league opened in 2005 and new acting commissioner of the Cold Zipper League.

EJ: Congratulations on being selected to become the new league commissioner! How are you making the transition from league manager to managing both your team and the entire league? 

Pee: So far the transition has worked pretty smoothly. Because the season has not started yet, I haven’t had to balance managing both my own team and the league. I’ve realized, however, the majority of work managing the league comes before the season. A lot of behind of the scenes work has to be done recruiting new managers, setting up the league, figuring out draft dates, generating discussion and making decisions about season stat and rule changes, etc. I have a huge appreciation for all the work Mark has done in the years past. Once the season starts there is not as much work managing the league other than posting updates, passing trades, pestering any inactive managers, and making decisions about any league controversies. I like the challenge of maintaining and furthering the skill level, activity, and excitement that makes Cold Zipper so enjoyable.

EJ: As acting commissioner, are there any changes or adjustments that you have in mind for the 2011 season?

Pee: I have a few changes I’d like to see, but that does not mean they are going to change for 2011. I will bring up or go along with ideas that will be seen in the forums. I will still hold voting over league changes, so don’t expect a new power hungry commissioner. I expect to see a lot of ideas thrown out by different managers in the pre-season. Obviously every individual idea cannot be voted on, so some decisions must be made to decide what issues to even vote on. 

EJ: You are entering the 7th year as a manager in this league. Talk about your time in this league and how it has changed over the years.

Pee: There is a vast difference between the 2005 season and the present. The first year of Cold Zipper seemed meant for a learning experience. We almost needed to have a year of unknowledgeable, inactive, and Pot Belly sandwich trading managers to learn what would make a competitive and fun league. We’ve learned from mistakes in the past; rules are set up to ensure fairness across the board. I don’t remember the exact numbers, but I know for a fact that almost every season has recorded more message board posts than the year before it. I love the communication and extra interaction many managers make with the league. As for me personally… it seems the longer I play in Cold Zipper the worse I do. To save my self esteem I will attribute this to the competition growing rather than having “lucky seasons” in past. 

EJ: If you were to choose one season as "the best", which one would it be and why?

Pee: Without hesitation, 2006 was my best season because I walked away with a championship. The Walapin Walabees were defeated, and to this day he still claims he was 2/3 of an inning away from a CG/SHO that would have earned him first place. I haven’t checked his math, but I still don’t believe him and am satisfied with winning by a solid 6.5 points.

EJ: Are there any teams in the league that you would consider as having a rivalry with? 

Pee: The Twinkie Treats rivalry began in 2007 when I beat him by half a point and grew even larger with a 1 point victory in 2008. From then on he beat me by 74.5 point in 2009 and I beat him by 82.5 point in 2010. So I guess you could say the “down to the wire” rivalry isn’t what it used to be. I always have the internal rivalry to defeat family members as well (Walapin Walabees, Buckwheat Pancakes, Bruisers), but my main priority is simply to place as well as I can.

EJ: Is there any meaning behind the team name Peehands?

Pee: Some people’s hands are wet after going to the bathroom because they don’t dry their hands well enough. This doesn’t apply to me. 

EJ: What have been your best draft picks, by year?

Pee: I typically draft average teams. I develop them over the course of the year, so I don’t have groundbreaking draft picks too often. I could look up my best ones, but that would take too long. 

EJ: What has been your best move (pickup/trade)?

Pee: My best pickup was Jered Weaver his rookie season in 2006; this was a big reason I won that year (in 123 IP, 11W, 105K/33BB, 2.56ERA, 1.03 WHIP).

EJ: What part of fantasy baseball do you think you're best at?

Pee: Finding solid relief pitching for little to no cost. I find Holds a really easy category to rack up points in. There is a lot of depth in the free agent pool throughout the year for set up men.

EJ: What move do you regret making the most in your Cold Zipper career?

Pee: For me the moves that hurt the most are having pitchers on the bench when they pitch a CG and/or SHO. This has happened a few times in my career, and they deserve tears every time.

EJ: Any predictions on how the 2011 season will turn out?

Pee: Nope. After last year, anything can happen. Other than Heres A Free Lesson winning.

EJ: How much time a week do you spend on fantasy baseball?

Pee: In my college years, at least 20. Most of this time was spent watching Gameday and masturbating to Arron Harang pitching his prime years. Now that I’m working, I fear it will only be around 10-12. The amount of player research will be about the same, but I won’t be able to watch as many games as I used to.

EJ: From your perspective as a former champion in 2006, what do you think is the most important part of building a winning team in this league?

Pee: Fantasy Baseball is a stock market. Buy low, sell high, and take risks on some rookies. Sometimes you get lucky and some times you don’t. Making key trades throughout the season will win championships. This is one of the reasons the Walapin’ Walabees places well every year. As annoying as it is that he sends hundreds of ridiculous trade offers, sometimes that’s what it takes to make a good deal.

EJ: This year, there will be quite a few rookie teams, more than we generally see. How do you think this will affect the league?

Pee: I have a lot of confidence that our new teams will be active and competitive in our league. Some may have a hard time, adjusting to the 20 team [league with a] large statistical range aspect of the league, but I’m sure they will be fine as the season progresses. Part of me wants the new teams to succeed and have fun doing it, but another part of me wants to crush them as a Cold Zipper veteran. 

EJ: What has been your favorite moment in Cold Zipper?

Pee: Trading Carlos Delgado and Matt Garza for Mark Teixera to the Buckwheat Pancakes in 2009. It was a classic move to which Delgado was placed on the DL, but Yahoo hadn’t come out with the news yet. Pancakes hadn’t done his homework and accepted the trade, ending in a move that basically gave me Teixera for Garza.

EJ: Do you have any specific or long term Cold Zipper goals?

Pee: Win 2011

EJ: If you are willing to answer this question - What resources do you use

Pee: Fangraphs, Fantasy Pros 911, Razzball, & Evan Johnson

EJ: Is there anything else you would like to say to the other teams in Cold Zipper?

Pee: If anyone drafts Aaron Harangatang before me this year, you’re banned from the league!